Dear me from 2000,
Yes, am your grown up self from 2015. You must be shocked to find a mail from your future self. It won’t be such a news to you when I say it took less than a second to send an SMS to Dad that I am gonna reach home late tonight, right? Oh yeah, dad has even stopped his frantic calling. Oh that landline you are gobbling up the minutes on, is no more relevant.
I can’t enter into Uncle’s anymore without a phone call from the security office to their condo, thanks to remote access cards. They no longer worry about losing their keys and the usual smile at the security who let me in once upon a time seems to have lost its charm.
I do happily miss that tiring process of standing in a queue to collect my daily train tickets with correct change. We have one of those smart cards and when I swipe it and type the destination, the exact change is deducted from my balance.
Brace yourself, lot more amazing stuff on the way.
Dear me in 2016,
And this is yourself from 2025, and you don’t seem as surprised as the last time you got a letter from the future. Good, that is what technology seems to have made us look forward to surprises and shocks alike. Remember how you had to search for your crush in Facebook and then wait for him to accept your request? Thankfully, that is not a big deal anymore – Facebook has started suggesting to you of any new entrant in your apartment, class or your gym. And now once you are above 18 years of age and accept illegible terms and conditions, your auto-professionally-matic awesome profile is created in every dating website. Yeah, internet has finally replaced your Padosi waali aunty’s role in your life. Did I tell you that your profile doesn’t get auto-deleted when you get hitched? Got to love those bugs.
Dear me in 2016
Oh this time is 2030, just five years hence. Am not even going to attempt to surprise you this time. I just am writing to hammer some sense into your head about the guy you are not seeing now. When you are scoffing off at him because he is not partying like you do, he is working on a project that is going change our lives. No you are not marrying him, don’t be silly. Don’t let him turn you off.
Do you remember how you thought binge watching ‘ The Big Bang Theory’ was cool and Sheldon’s rules about dinner seemed ridiculous? Think again, sorry you can’t believe how much closer to the real life he was there then.
You know, everyday dad gets his food delivered off from the nearby restaurant based on his weekly medical check-ups from the family physician. You know how mom hesitantly (or not?) lets him get away from the prescribed diet, that doesn’t happen anymore.
And Mom has taken up her walking religiously thanks to her smart watch that wakes her up reminding her and mocking at her how much the neighbour aunt has shaped up. That’s some motivation, no?
Dear me in 2016
Didn’t tell you he was going to change our lives? Thanks to him, you are now being pushed and locked out off your house every Friday evening with a reservation made at your favourite restaurant with your “current” favourite person(s). Don’t worry there would be cab waiting to pick your drunk self at 2330 hours. You don’t have to mumble address to the driver and haggle for cab fare. Your driver prefers silence because it diligently watching out for the other cars driven by humans. That is a rarity and an invitation for chaos now, isn’t it? You would be glad on the strict measures against drunk and drive that the vehicles are fitted with breath analysers. Oh what a relief it is to be driven by unmanned cars when your regular car won’t let you sit on the driver’s seat, even if you had just smelled rubbing alcohol.
I have got to rush now as have a table for one booked for the evening at the Vegan place I have been frequenting, thanks to that calorie monitor and those vodka shots 3 weeks ago. My smart glasses has decided, based on my familial medical history and the frequent eye contact I have been sharing with the guy that runs the place, it is the best place for me to dine. I don’t want to be late for the dinner, for it might read it as indifference towards the guy and change the course of my love-life without as much as a skipped step. Rarely, you might miss the inquisitive Balu Uncle who would ask about your salary package or even the intrusive Gita Aunty who might put in a good word to the guy’s parents.
I shouldn’t be sitting here and thinking (and auto-typing) anymore; I might just be auto-matched to you!